14 فروری 2024

I can buy myself flowers

winter blues are sledging down in the snow 
someone picked all the grief from hearts 
to paint a big umbrella in the sky 
look at the bright, cloudless day
the pain learns to self-soothe as it grows up and becomes enormous 
I treasure the blues and griefs and love 
but it is getting heavier each day 
the last few straws broke my back 
then got stuck in my eyes somehow 
“seasonal allergies”, blotting the irritated, itchy and watery eyes I explain to a random stranger for absolutely no reason 
“for my mom,” pointing to the flowers 
I explain again with a shiny smile 
the gloss I applied in the car is rose-fresh 
the girl with the tattooed butterfly and pierced nose nods with a faint smile, blinking once 
meaning your secret is safe 
she might be reading all the secrets everyone has cautiously tucked behind their eyes at the checkout lines 
or nature hid behind the overcasting blues of the sky 
somewhere in the multiple keys attached 
to her lanyard is the one to a locker 
where her treasure is stashed safely 
there is one in my keychain, too 
being well aware that seasonal allergies will outlive seasonal flowers by a lifetime


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